Saget dirties up the Bank

Nicole Fano

Danny Tanner has a dirty mouth.

It will be difficult to watch “Full House” reruns in the same childlike way after Bob Saget’s racy performance at the TD Bank Sports Center on Saturday.

Nearly 1,600 students filled the 2,000 available seats. The Bank looked packed in comparison to the last spring concert, The Fray.

The arena echoed with Quinnipiac students’ laughs, howls and screams. An elated audience welcomed Saget, all thanks to the opening act. Australian-born comedian James Smith roused the audience with his laid-back humor. In a matter of 15 minutes, Smith bashed Tiger Woods, Sarah Palin, the oil spill in the Gulf, the Kardashians, and America’s recession.

“How the f—k does a bank go bankrupt?” Smith joked about America’s economy.

After Smith stirred up the audience, students went wild when Saget took the stage. Minutes into his performance, Saget focused his humor on freshman class president Michael Cacciatore.

“What pet did you shoot to get that hat?” Saget said.

Cacciatore intentionally wanted Saget to make fun of him during the show. He purposely sported a Hawaiian shirt to get the comedian’s attention.

“It felt pretty great when he was making fun of me, because Bob Saget has been the center of a ton of jokes I’ve made in the past, and it feels pretty awesome being the center of some of his,” Cacciatore said.

In addition to Cacciatore, Saget turned his attention to SGA Junior Vice President Kaite Lovett and asked the audience if she was the “school ho.”

“When Saget did call me out, I was personally dying of laughter,” Lovett said. “I knew sitting in the front would probably result in some jokes made about me, and I was ready for that. As raunchy as his jokes were, how many people can actually say that Danny Tanner called them a ‘ho?’ It’s a comedy show, so I wasn’t offended. I’m glad everyone got some laughs out of it.”

Saget asked Student Programming Board (SPB) about Quinnipiac’s habits and hangouts prior to the show, so he could incorporate that information into his routine.

“Bob Saget is a great comedian because he takes the time to learn about his audience,” SPB Mainstage Chair Jamie Kloss said. “His routine was really a conversation with the audience, and students really enjoyed it.”

Saget had some questions for the audience about the “slut bus,” “Hep Creek,” Toad’s Place, and Ray & Mike’s Deli, which he referred to as “Mike & Ron’s Deli.” Saget also noticed the wind turbines at the York Hill campus, which he referred to as “metal s—-t that powers nothing.”

An audience member yelled out, “Where’s Vicky?” A quick-witted Saget responded, “That is the gayest ‘Full House’ reference I’ve ever heard.”

The audience’s interaction didn’t stop there.

Saget referred to a wild audience member named Duncan as “Hemorrhage man,” due to his incoherent and spasmodic screams.

“I will never f—king forget this show for the rest of my life,” Saget laughed.

Then Saget brought his guitar onstage where he sang several dirty songs, including one of his most well-known songs “Danny Tanner is Not Gay” to the tune of the Backstreet Boys’ “I Want It That Way.”

“As far as the crowd interaction with Saget went, I think it was pretty amazing,” junior Andrew Barry said. “The whole Duncan thing, Hemorrhage man, Mike in the front row, and the fact that he actually knew stuff about Quinnipiac and the Hamden area was awesome.”

“All the work that we put into the show paid off. The crowd was excited, [there were] lots of positive comments as people were leaving,” Kloss said. “The laughter was consistent throughout the show, so I think everyone had a good time.”

Photo credit: Charlotte Greene