I never thought that a phrase coined on social media would become the heart of one of my most significant opinions, yet here we are.
The phrase “don’t yuck my yum,” otherwise meaning don’t disparage my personal tastes simply because they’re not your own, has become more and more meaningful to me in the last year.
When it comes to personal preference, I always try not to project my own thoughts and feelings onto others, whether that’s foods, clothing, entertainment or their choice in friends. Because of this, I find it difficult to understand why others feel the need to comment on what I like.
Why do you care?
It’s one thing to voice your opinion when asked, but unsolicited and often negative advice from others always leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth and feelings of self-doubt in my mind.
Judging other people is not new. It’s been around forever, and the reason we do it is to avoid dealing with potential feelings of inferiority and shame. Since judging others can never give a person what they really need, they feel like they need to keep doing it creating an endless toxic cycle, according to Psychology Today.
A recent “yuck” that has been bothering me is the need to comment on my choices on beverages and style. If I had a nickel for everytime someone told me I was hurting myself by drinking a Celsius, I would have enough money to buy the company.
The same goes for the water bottle I carry with me. I’m either told I’m “too boring and basic” or that I simply own something because it’s trending. There’s also my personal favorite, “You can’t even think for yourself.” All of this because of a Stanley-brand cup is mind-boggling, to put it lightly.
My roommates and I use the phrase “don’t yuck my yum” pretty frequently in our suite. While we use it mostly because it sounds funny, it’s also a gentle reminder to be considerate of others’ thoughts, feelings and preferences. You never really know how your words affect people, and it’s important to not make someone feel less-than for their choices.
Without beating on a dead drum, I have to mention the negative impacts of social media in this concept.
If you really think about it, there’s nothing that impacts judgment more than social media; caring about what others think is the entire backbone of the online community. It’s the reason Instagram added a “hide likes” feature because the same platform was pushing younger generations toward self-harm. It’s why 90% of young women report using a filter or editing their photos before posting. It’s also how a simple Google search of “why is social media toxic” prompts thousands of scholarly articles linking mental health disparities to online platforms.
While this is part of a much bigger problem, my point is to stop commenting on what other people do with their lives. I’m not saying you can’t have your own opinions, just be more mindful of the way you share them.
In a world where there’s so much hate on the internet and with how we interact with others, why do we need to judge them too? Can’t we just let people live their lives?
I’m not saying I’m perfect; I definitely do slip up and judge people without thinking because it’s so ingrained into our culture. It’s something I’m working on, and something you can work on too.
Some helpful tips for reducing judgment are noticing what triggers your judgmental thoughts and pushing yourself to interact more with new people, places and ideas. At the end of the day, forcing our thoughts onto others can be summed up into one word: intention.
If we make an effort to be more intentional with our trains of thought, our words, the meaning behind our words and the way we perceive others, we can solve a whole lot more than “yucking someone’s yum.”
It’s so easy for individuals to make assumptions from the outside without even knowing someone. And honestly, what I choose to drink, wear or carry around with me is none of your business. If I wanted your opinion, I would ask for it.
