Last Friday night, I was celebrating the start of senior year at Aunt Chilada’s. It was great to see old friends and meet new people, until a man I don’t even know tried to set me up with his friend. Sure, people had been drinking, so the setup wasn’t too shocking to me. However, what he said to try and hook us up was disgusting:
“This guy’s like Bill Cosby,” he said. “He’ll put something in your drink!”
Are you kidding me? Why would anyone think that’s okay to say to someone, sober or drunk?
I continued to enjoy the rest of my night at the bar, but I still couldn’t help but be repulsed by this comment. And the funniest part (if there is a funny part) is that he said “she totally wants you” to his friend as I walked away.
Let’s get one thing straight – just because a woman gives you the time of day does not mean she is interested. Most people in this world try to be decent and friendly human beings. Being nice does not equate to “wanting you.”
The fact that these two guys were ignorant enough to think this joke is funny is bad enough in itself. But the fact that people think it’s okay to make jokes surrounding sexual assault is despicable.
According to the Washington Examiner, about 13 percent of female college students have been sexually assaulted on campus. However, this statistic doesn’t even include the numbers of unreported sexual assaults and sexual assaults that may have happened at another point in a woman’s lifetime.
Although most people don’t constantly have statistics and facts like the above running through their minds, try to think for at least a few seconds before making misogynistic comments. Sexual violence is a crime, not a joke.
Even though 13 percent of college women being sexually assaulted may seem like a small number, sexual assault may affect even more women in different ways. Obviously I am sensitive to the subject myself, but I am not the only one. Sexual assault is degrading, and the fact that some men find it funny makes me angry enough to write an entire article about it.
Making jokes about sexual assault is not funny. You are not funny.
But cracking inappropriate “jokes” doesn’t even cover half of the ridiculous things that happen in bars and clubs around here. A man grabbed my hand asking for my number as I was leaving New Haven the other night. Maybe if we had met or danced earlier that night, I wouldn’t have been so caught off-guard. But I never met this guy in my life and didn’t even notice him as I walked to my friend’s car. What makes you think I want your number?
Of course, a stranger grabbing my hand irritated me, but that’s probably the most chivalrous thing I’ve seen men do at Bar or Aunchie’s. As I danced with my roommates during our last visit to Aunchie’s, a guy next to me just reached over and put his arm around my waist. Naturally, his hand continued to move down as I glared at him in disbelief.
I’m definitely one of many women who this happens to on a weekly basis, as I saw this man and other men do the same thing to my friends throughout the rest of our time at the bar.
As if making jokes about sexual assault isn’t bad enough, acting on these jokes or thoughts is even worse. Wearing skinny jeans doesn’t mean a woman is trying to look good for strangers trying to grope her. If I wanted you to grab my butt, I’d let you know (but don’t get your hopes up).
The next time you want to pick up a girl at Aunchie’s or Bar, don’t be a pig. Start a normal conversation without feeling someone up. Women make up 62 percent of this campus – you should probably start respecting them.
