The 13 people you meet in the library

Lindsay Roberts

All night studying, last minute printing, endless searching for books and open cubicles in the library- everyone seems to be on edge. It only makes sense that people can become easily aggravated as the silence of the library makes even the minimal distraction irksome.

Sitting at your cubicle, there are numerous types of people who are responsible for these distractions. On any given trip to the library, here are some of the characters you might encounter:

Psycho Printer: I am guilty of being this character and apologize to whoever was sitting in the cubicle next to the machine the day I accidentally printed a blank page behind all of my 60 handouts.

Social Butterfly: This is the person who knows everyone in the library. They are so popular that they do not even have to get up, everyone flocks to them. Just as they are done talking and you think you have a minute of silence again, oh look, another best friend for life is approaching.

Library Flirt: Their tactic is usually to sneak up on the person, ask what they are studying, and then completely divert their attention from it. It really is an ingenious way to get someone to talk to you, since they are physically trapped.

Aisle Shuffler: This is the lone soul who came at the wrong time and is forced to roam the aisles looking for an empty cubicle as half of the library stares at them. It happens to the best of us, and you can only pray that the empty desk you see in the distance does not have a laptop attached to it.

Facebook Stalker: We are all guilty of it, but for some reason catching someone doing it in the library is especially creepy. The Facebook Stalker is not really liked by the Aisle Shuffler because they think they could be putting the spot to a much better use.

Small Bladder: This would be the person that frequents the bathroom and has hopefully found the sense to sit near it.

Buzzer: When the library desks and the vibrate setting of a cell phone meet, the noise never fails to scare me out of my focus. The message is apparently quite lengthy and urgent, seeing as the noise will often occur multiple times, rapid fire.

“I’m In the Library”: There are some bold individuals who actually answer their phones in their cubicles. Their intentions are good and the first thing they say is, “Hey, I am in the library.” But the person on the other line does not care and asks about the weekend. Obviously it was “sick” and there begins the 20 minute conversation that is occasionally interrupted with, “OK, I really better go because I’m in the library”

Sound Proofers: These are the kids that mistakenly believe those glass rooms are soundproof. This can become pretty entertaining when their conversations become audible thanks to their outside voices.

Teeth of Steal: It’s snack time and this person somehow located the loudest bag of chips ever made. The snack turns into a meal, and you just listened to them thoroughly enjoy it.

Black Lung: This person coughs so much they start to convince you that you need to cough too.

The Invisible Student: This person evaporated around five hours ago, but the book they randomly grabbed from the shelves and threw on the desk still holds their vacant seat.

Comfy Cozy: This adorable, yet pitiful student probably gets a better quality of sleep in the comfy chairs than in their dorm rooms.

The atmosphere of the library presents us with certain characters. Sometimes we are the ones acting out the parts, while other times we are the distractions that people are cursing at under his or her breath. Next time you are in the library, be on the lookout for these typical library characters.