The good news

Lindsay Roberts

With all the stories of economic downturn and acts of senseless violence, it is hard to see anything but serious and sad stories in the news. But there are stories that show a lighter and sometimes crazier side to real life, and we scoured the globe to bring a few of the highlights to you. Prepare to be inspired.

Burglar Bark: A woman in Georgia scared off a burglar by acting like a dog. At 11 on a Saturday night this woman crawled on her floor and made “large dog” noises, scratching the door while the burglar feverishly turned and slammed against the doorknob. Now, I would never be brave enough or creative enough to react in this way; however, I can see her thought process. Calling the cops would just be too cliché and their response would take too long. Instead of running in fear and being a victim she confronted the perpetrator head on, literally positioning herself in the face of danger. The police report is unclear on the “specific dog-like behavior, such as barking” that the woman produced to send this unlucky burglar sprinting off the porch, but I imagine the barking was monotone and realistic. There are plenty of stories in the news about people breaking into homes and doing unspeakable things; this woman restored my faith that you do not need a security system to defend what is yours. You go girl.

Pink against creeps: I remember being in a taxi cab in Chicago with my brother and aunt, and the entire ride the taxi driver sang us a song about how he wanted to date my aunt. Sure, some of it was humorous, but most of his lyrics were just inappropriate and uncomfortable. Well, in the city of Puebla, Mexico, women are taking a stand against creepy taxi drivers. They feel that the male drivers speak in an entirely too sexual manner and ask personal questions, so now a fleet of pink taxis are available in the city that are exclusively driven by women and do not stop for men. The pink taxis include a make-up kit, GPS and an alarm button. Another bonus, the driver probably keeps her eyes on the road and not in the rear view mirror.

I would walk 10,000 miles: There are so many songs out there about walking miles for love, but this 88-year-old woman in Colorado Springs can actually walk the walk. Every day, Martha Michel walks around the lake of the Namaste Alzheimer’s Center in memory of her husband Lester, who was a patient there. She and Lester were married 56 years and used to hike the Colorado peaks before Lester became ill. Martha has been walking since 1998, and has devoted enough circles around the center to equate walking across America three times. If that’s not love I don’t know what is, this story sounds like something straight from “The Notebook.”

Flying Feces: This happened a while ago, but the sentencing was recent. This story supports the drastic measures Dog Lady took to keep her home burglar-free. A man in San Diego facing home-invasion robbery charges brought a bag of his own feces to the courtroom. McGowan asked for mistrial days before, and when he found out the judge refused, he returned to the courtroom prepared with poop in his pockets. The ironic thing about this story is McGowan asked for a mistrial because he feared he had shown signs of mental illness in his first courtroom appearance. Well McGowan, nothing says mentally sound like smearing poop in your lawyer’s face and flinging it into the jury box. Even a juror’s MacBook was not spared. May sound like a joke, but pulling crap like that will earn you 31 years in prison, which was McGowan’s final sentence.

And you thought the news was boring.