Wreck: Glitter Tears

Jeanette Cibelli

[media-credit name=”Screenshot Courtesy of Youtube / HeidiCupcake ” align=”aligncenter” width=”500″]wreck youtuber heidicupcake crop[/media-credit]

We all need to cry sometimes. Tears of sadness, tears of joy or maybe tears of that existential crisis of “What am I doing with my future?” that college students know all too well. It’s natural, and I’ll never shame someone for crying, and neither should you. Tears reveal vulnerability, sensitivity and emotional depth.

However, tears have recently become something of a fashion trend. Glitter tears, to be exact. A baffling concept, I know.

Allow me to explain. People have been seen and photographed with glitter under their eyes. Skillful application makes it look like they’re actually weeping glitter. Sure, this looks cool on models and in really artsy Instagram photos. Maybe it would be fun to try on New Year’s Eve, but that’s over 10 months away. Unfortunately, there are some real concerns surrounding this new makeup fad.

First of all, this is a danger to your eyes. Other than chemicals or sharp objects, I can’t think of something that would be more unpleasant to have in your eyes than glitter. Bottles of glitter often have a warning on them that reads “Avoid eye contact.” You’re literally wearing an eye irritant as makeup.

Second of all, what if you actually need to cry? Girls already dread those goopy, black mascara tears, so why would you want to throw glitter into the mix? I’m pretty sure Maybelline hasn’t come out with a new line of waterproof glitter, so it’s going to go everywhere. You’ll rub your eyes and make it worse. Maybe this is something Maybelline should look into as their next business venture.

Nevertheless, I must admit that glitter tears do seem to demand a certain bit of talent. You need to have the steady, precise hand of a makeup artist. I’m not sure how else you could glue glitter to your skin without getting it in your eyes, which I have no doubt would be the case if I attempted to apply glitter tears. They also require the self confidence to be bold and daring, which society should always appreciate in young women.

But I mean, let’s think about this logically. If you find yourself concealing the bags under your eyes with glitter, you’re probably getting ready for a night out. You’re probably going to Toad’s and you’re probably going to cry at some point in the night – tears of water, as was biologically intended – and then what? Your glitter artwork will be hopelessly smeared and you WILL get glitter in your eyes. Doesn’t sound like a fun night to me. –J. Cibelli