I’m tired of people having regrets about having a bad time in New Haven, or vice versa, wishing they had gone out instead of staying in. In a social situation, you should do what you want to do, not necessarily what other people are doing.

If you don’t want to do something, but feel you should go along with what other people are doing, then you are wrong. People will respect your choice, and let you do your own thing.

Let’s say you want to stay in your room and watch a movie, but your friends want you to come to a party in another dorm. Too often this person will be be dragged out of his or her room to a party. This isn’t what they wanted to do at all. You get to the party, and all you are thinking about is watching that movie – leading to a terribly boring night.

On the other hand, if you aren’t really enthusiastic about seeing this movie, and the opportunity to go to a party comes up, then by all means go out and have fun.

I am writing this because of a personal experience. One Friday night, I had just gotten back from a hockey game, and I was greeted with a few of my friends just talking in my room. They were talking about how they were going to go hang out in another dorm that night, and asked me if I wanted to come. All I could think about was playing Madden ’09 with one of my roommates. When this idea of going to another dorm came up, it didn’t click with me at all.

I stupidly accepted the invite because they were my friends. When we got to the other dorm, my friends were all having a good time, but I felt out of place and insecure. When I got back to the dorm, I laid in bed and thought, “what a waste of a night.”

This has nothing to do with how much I like hanging out with my friends, because the very next night, I had a blast with them.

Don’t be scared that by doing what you want to do will make you a loner. If you are doing something that you really want to do, and you are enjoying yourself while doing it, people will notice and want to join you.

This issue has a lot to do with each person being a leader or a follower. But I think even if you are a follower, you still carry some confidence in yourself to do whatever you please.